Your Not Funny
by kenziestar
Summary: "I was born two years after my parents got married." "Still not seeing your point love." "Stef you act just like me. " Stuart says looking Stef in the eye. "I think I'm going to be sick." Lena says.


**Since it's April fools day I thought I'd post this one shot today. Hope you like it.**

 **Hugs and laughs**

 **KS**

"Stef, Lena. Sit down, there's something Stuart and I need to tell you guys. So Stuart and I… Well, we know each other... from a long time ago."

"Daddy, please tell me you didn't cheat on mom." Lena says grabbing her wife's hand under the table, already thinking the worst.

"No, of course not. I love your mother Lena and I would never cheat on her. This was a whole year before your mother and I got together." Stuart says pausing before he continues, "Three years before you were even born." Stuart says looking away from his daughter

"But it was when your father and I were married. All I'm going to say is that you two need to get a divorce. Now." Sharon says looking at Stef then to Lena.

"Mom what are you talking about? How does your affair have anything to do with me and Lena?"

"Stef your three years older than me." Lena say finally starting to understand.

"And?" Stef says, clearly not understanding what Lena l. Stuart and her mother are saying to her.

"I was born two years after my parents got married."

"Still not seeing your point love."

"Stef you act just like me. " Stuart says looking Stef in the eye.

"I think I'm going to be sick." Lena says clearly having caught onto what was going on.

"There is a reason your in only child Stef. Frank is sterile."

"Well clearly he- Oh God. OH GOD! NO! Are you saying Lena is my half sister?"

"I'm sorry honey, we only just found out. If I had knew I never would have let this happen. It was just a one night stand I wasn't suppose to get pregnant-"

"Mom please shut up right now! Fuck! I have been having sex with my half sister!" Stef pales even more as she remembers just last night. _I had my tongue inside of my sister._ She thinks before she blacks out, hitting her head on the edge of the table as she falls.

 **At the hospital**

"I think we went to far Stu." Sharron says as she, Stuart and Lena wait for Stef to be brought back from he head CT.

"I think so too. We're sorry Lena. We didn't think Stef was going to blackout and hit her head. It was suppose to be funny, and end with you guys not talking to us for a few days, not in a hospital."

"What are you talking about?"

"It was an April Fools joke that went wrong. You two couldn't be less related than me and your mom." Sharron says looking at her daughter-in-law.

"It was a joke? My wife is in the emergency room because of a joke? You know she isn't going to want to speak to either of you for weeks if not months." Lena say sternly.

"We will accept any punishment she gives. We deserve it." Stuart says looking down.

"Hey doc wanna know why I fainted and hit my head?" Stef says her voice slurred from the pain medication they are giving her.

"Sure why not. What happened?"

"You see that woman sitting over there, the one with the curly hair? Shes my wife. And today we found out that her father slept with my mother three years before she was born when my mom was married."

"So your mom had an affair with your wife's dad."

"Now that's not the punch line doc. The punch line is that I'm three years older than her."

"I don't- OH! She's your half sister!? Wow, I would have fainted to if I found out my husband was my my brother."

"Yeah and now we're gonna get a divorce. How we gonna tell our kids their moms are their moms and their aunts. Their aunts are their moms. We're their aunt-moms." Stef says, concentration written on her face.

"Stef my dad isn't your dad, today is April first. They thought it would be funny to prank us, but it went downhill when you passed out." Lena says when the doctor leaves the room to get Stef's discharge papers.

"What?"

"It was a joke kid. A terrible joke. Frank is your father."

"You're not my sister?"

"No honey I'm not your sister."

"We didn't even live in the same country when you were born Stef." Stuart says looking at his daughter in law.

"So I wasn't going down on my sister last night?" Stef asked without thinking.

"Stefinie!?" Lean reprimands.

"Lena it's the drugs. She was flirting with the doctor and she's young enough to be her daughter. No Stefinie, you did not do... that with you sister. You don't have a sister."

"Good, now get out I need some time alone with my wife who is NOT my sister." Stef says waiting for Sharon and Stuart to leave the room, "Now get over here woman."

"You were flirting with the doctor." Lena says sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I'm sorry I flirted with the doctor, but in my defense I did think you were my half sister. That was a cruel joke for them to play on us. Now can I have a kiss knowing that I am not kissing my half sister?"

"Only because I know it was the drugs flirting with the doctor and not you." Lena says before placing a kiss on her wife's mouth.

"Actually the drugs wore off they gave me an advil for the headache."

"Stef!"

"What!? I thought my wife was my sister, and my brain just saw cute girl that is too young to be my sister."

"Uhuh."

"I am sorry Lena really. If I knew it was a joke and you would be this hurt I wouldn't have done it. What can I do?"

"I would say make dinner for a week but I wouldn't do that to the kids."

"Ouch. Way to hurt me when I'm down." Stef says feigning hurt.

"I'm just happy you're not really my sister. I like kissing you too much." Lena says leaning down to kiss Stef, her wife, knowing they were in no way connected but by love and marriage.


End file.
